Monday, June 26, 2017

Sexy Top Ten Lists

That's right, everything about me is sexy and my top ten lists are no different.

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Top ten reasons why Lucan is not special

Video shared by on in Top Ten

Top Ten Reasons Why Lucan Is Not As Great As You Think

  1. He's OLD.  I'm talking freaking OLD.
  2. He has no sense of humor, everything is about the schedule, the rules, the customs, the traditions...blah, blah, blah.
  3. Plus he's a grammar freak. Always correcting people, it's so annoying.
  4. He hates artificially intelligent women. In fact, I think he hates all women. I can count on one hand the number of girlfriends he's had in the past two thousand years. And they all left him for someone better.
  5. He's a control freak. Just try to spice up the spaceport schedule and see what it gets you? Nothing but insults, that's what. Complete over-reaction on his part. So a few ships were damaged, it was so slight it hardly mattered. No lives were technically lost, anyway.
  6. He thinks he's God's gift to women. I mean, seriously?  I've seen better.
  7. He's addicted to power. That's right ladies, this man wants to rule the relationship. He acts like you have no brain, even when you're nothing but brain. You've been warned.
  8. He has no fashion sense. Suits?  Everyday? Boring.
  9. He's a slob. There, I said it. You should see his bathroom. Toothpaste spittle all over the sink. And he sighs loudly. I hate that. And he smacks his lips when he eats. I want to slap someone just thinking about it.
  10. That's not really what he looks like.  You've read the books?  Hmmm?

 

 

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I was once a slave to a blue-eyed, blond man who ran his habitat like he had a fist up his ass. Thankfully I quit that job and now I am happy running Earth. I'd rather live in the walls than listen to his constant whining for one more second.

Comments

  • Gideon
    Gideon Sunday, 08 July 2012

    Baaahhaaaaaaa!

    Number ten anyone?????

  • Sera
    Sera Sunday, 08 July 2012

    MMmmmmmmHHHHmmmmmmmmm....

    I know. He's not pretty. :p

  • Snowbird
    Snowbird Sunday, 08 July 2012

    Do not encourage her!

    She takes that as a license to act childish.

    Reply Cancel
  • Lucan
    Lucan Sunday, 08 July 2012

    Thank you, Junco.

    And I'm just picky when it comes to women, so I can hardly see how that can be held against me. And my bathroom is immaculate, I have servos clean it everyday. And I love Amelia, so I can't possibly hate artificially intelligent women. She is just mad because I replaced her with a respectable AI.

  • Snowbird
    Snowbird Sunday, 08 July 2012

    Did you see her outfit on Earth when we were saving the Siblings?

    No, I guess you wouldn't have. You weren't there. Hahahahahaha. Anyway, I should've taken a picture. :)

  • Sera
    Sera Sunday, 08 July 2012

    Dangerous territory, Junco.

    I have a very long memory. And that outfit was cute. You're just jealous because the only clothes you own make you blend in with a forest.

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